Lizzie - Chapter 18 - The Note

Somehow, Lizzie’s life quickly returned to normal.

The morning after, her mom sat her back down and gave her another apology.

Being in a forgiving mood, she accepted it. In turn, Jennifer ended the punishments a couple of days early, but only after making her promise she’d learned her lessons. 

Her mom had taken her out to her favorite restaurant for dinner, and even allowed her to get dessert. That evening, Lizzie played with her Switch until she could hardly keep her eyes open.

It felt almost weird picking out her own PJs. Having not done so in so long, she spent an embarrassingly long time debating which ones to wear, slipping in and out of several pairs. No matter what she wore, she found her image in the mirror — with a noticeable goodnites bump — almost… foreign. Why couldn't they look and feel like her Rosalina ones?

Despite her anticipation, Monday’s return to school was also uneventful. Her teachers continued to teach and hand out homework. Her classmates continued to chat and gossip. After classes, she spent her time doing homework, playing games, and studying chess.

In every semblance of the word, her life had returned to normal. But it couldn’t have. 

Or more precisely, it shouldn’t have. Having exposed her deepest and darkest secret, it felt that at least something should’ve changed.

Yet, the world continued to move on without a semblance of disturbance. So now here she was, sitting in English class listening to Ms. Wu analyze yet another scene of MacBeth in painfully excruciating detail.

Lizzie shook her head. Wasn’t this exactly what she wanted? For her to be able to relieve the burden on her chest while having her friend not judge her for who she was? 

She should be happy, elated even… so why was it that she couldn't stop her hands from fidgeting?

Her memories went back to that night, Madison staying by her side, soothing and comforting her, chatting with her until she’d passed out. She couldn’t even remember when her friend had left.

She did however, remember her dreams. The hours she’d spent smiling as she’d soared through the air, traveling to all the exotic wonders of the world.

But when morning had come, the disturbing thoughts had reinvaded her mind. Sure, her friend had sympathized with her. But with such a big secret, something must have changed about their relationship.

Images of Madison’s muted expression as she’d listened to her story resurfaced, the poker-face leaving Lizzie questioning if she truly knew what her friend thought. 

Perhaps that’s why she’d typed out several long-winded messages to her. Asking — no, pleading — for her friend to just tell her the truth, to relieve her of the agonizing torment of uncertainty. Thankfully, each time she’d come to her senses, deleting them before clicking send.

Lizzie ran a hand through her hair. The tension was driving her crazy. It really didn't help that the two had hardly talked since then. With Madison preoccupied by her other clubs, the two hadn't met in person. And Lizzie wasn’t sure how to bring up the subject through text, their few exchanges were thus spent on the pragmatics of their history project and the upcoming chess tournament.

What if their friendship dissolved? What if Madison suddenly decided she couldn't associate herself with a bedwetter? She was her only close friend at school. If Madison abandoned her, who would she have left? 

I shouldn't have told her anything. 

Lizzie closed her eyes, imagining her life as a social reject, her classmates unwilling to even talk to her after Madison had casted her aside.

She needed to make new friends. And she needed to make sure they never found out about her problem.

“Lizzie?” Ms. Wu’s voice pierced her thoughts.

Blinking, Lizzie realized her teacher was standing right next to her desk. The entire class stared at her intently as she felt her cheeks blossom. “Sorry, what was the question?” 

“I was asking if you’d be willing to play Lady Macbeth for the next scene.”

“Oh, umm, sure.” 

“Alright then, please start us off.” 

Lizzie fumbled, trying to figure out where they'd left off.

“Page twenty-seven, at the top.” 

“Thanks,” Lizzie squeaked, standing up. There were a few giggles from behind her, but Ms. Wu’s stare quickly shut them up. 

“Thank you everyone,” Ms. Wu said after the reading was concluded. 

Lizzie let out a small sigh, sitting down and letting her stomach settle. 

“Now, for the remainder of class, I want you to write about one of the symbolisms you saw in this last scene, and I’ll have a few volunteers share before the end of class.”

Just as she was about to begin, Ms. Wu interrupted again. “Lizzie, do you mind coming up to my desk for a moment?”

The request immediately attracted everyone’s attention, and as she approached the desk, Lizzie could feel their stares on her back.

“I’m not sure how to ask this so I’ll be straightforward. Are you feeling okay? You seemed abnormally distracted today,” Ms. Wu asked quietly.

“It’s nothing,” Lizzie whispered.

“Are you sure? If there’s anything I can do to help…“

“I’m okay. Just a bit more stressed than usual because of some other projects recently,” Lizzie said, a statement that was technically true.

Thankfully, Ms. Wu bought it, and dismissed her.

"Are you in trouble?" Selina asked as she passed by, her voice full of fake concern. Lizzie simply ignored her and returned to her seat.

Class soon ended, and Lizzie scurried off to her locker, her thoughts still running rampant in her mind.

“Hey Lizzie,” the voice behind her caused her to jump a little.

She turned around, only to find Vanessa and two of her entourage staring back.

“Oh, hey… Vanessa right? Whatsup?” Lizzie asked, in a desperate attempt to recover. 

The blonde tilted her head slightly as her friends glanced at each other.

Lizzie cringed. Of course her name was Vanessa, everyone knew the girl who threw the craziest parties in the neighborhood. 

“Anywho, you free Friday? I’m having a little get-together at my place.”

Lizzie blinked. Only people like Madison and Marco got invites, and Vanessa wasn’t exactly known for expanding her friend group.

“Is that a no?” Vanessa tapped her long nails against her cheek.

“No… I mean yes!” Lizzie said with far more excitement than she intended. “I mean, yeah sure, I can stop by… What time?”

Vanessa smiled. “Lindsey here will send you the deets, I’ll see ya there.” With that, the girl spun around on her heels with elegant ease. 

Lizzie held her breath, only when Vanessa and her posse were out of sight did she do a mini fist pump. 

Yes! She couldn’t help but smile. Despite knowing that she was probably only invited because of her friendship with Madison, it still didn’t change the fact that she had been invited to Vanessa’s party.

And it was exactly what she needed: a chance to make new friends. And once she did, Madison wouldn't feel awkward about socializing with her either! All of a sudden, her week was looking up. Life couldn’t be better. 

She had to tell her the good news. Skipping down the hallway, she contemplated about what outfit she should wear. Maybe she should buy a pair of heels. And of course, she’d need to ask Madison for help with her makeup.

***

“I finally found you! Guess who got invited to the party on Friday?”

“Huh?” Madison asked lifting her head from the papers laid out on her table in the library.

“I said, guess who got invited to Vanessa’s party this Friday?”

“Oh, that’s this week? I mean, that’s cool, but isn't that like two days before the tournament?” Madison lowered her head again.

“Yeah, but it's Vanessa's party, I have to go! So are you free before to do my makeup and help me pick out outfits?”

“Um, yeah, I guess,” she said without lifting her head.

“What time?”

“Could we figure it out later? I’m a bit busy.”

Lizzie blinked. “Oh, okay,” she said, shivering at the ice cold water that had just been poured over her. She frowned, clearly her friend was occupied by more important things. “I’ll catch you later then.”

Shouldn’t her friend be at least a bit excited for her? Madison knew how big of a thing it was for her to be invited to the party, right?

She ended up walking around aimlessly until she noticed her choir friends chatting, and she rushed to catch up to them.

“— Just watching the new Kung Fu Panda with my family.” 

“Whatchu all talking about?”

“Oh, just what we’re doing this weekend. I’m watching a movie with my fam, and—” Anna started.

“And I’m going to Camellia’s with my sister,” Morgan cut her off.

“Isn’t that the super fancy afternoon tea place? I heard it's super difficult to even get a reservation.”

“Well, my sister has her ways. Anyways what are you doing over the weekend?” Morgan asked with what Lizzie swore was a small smirk.

“Oh, not much, probably just going to Vanessa’s party on Friday and then playing in the chess tournament with Madison,” she said, a smirk slipping through despite her best efforts.

“What? Vanessa’s party?!” The look on her face was priceless.

“That’s so cool, can we come too?”

“Well, I don’t think I can really invite others…”

“Aww… I heard her house is huge, and even some high-schoolers go.”

“Don't they usually have alcohol? Have you even drank before?” Morgan asked. 

“Uh… Yeah? Who hasn’t?” Technically it was the truth, even if her only experience was from a year ago when her dad had secretly let her try a small sip of his beer, to which she’d quickly spat back into the cup. What was so great about alcohol anyways?

“What’s your favorite drink then?” Morgan asked, eyes narrowing.

“Umm…” 

Thankfully, the bell rang right then, and Lizzie took the opportunity to excuse herself and rush off to class.

***

Lizzie hummed to herself as she strolled down the hall, still daydreaming about the party to come. Just two more classes and she could go home and begin testing out some outfits.

As she opened her locker, something pink fell out and floated to the floor. It was a sheet of paper, folded a few times. Curious, she picked it up. 

“I know your little secret. And if you arent careful everyone else soon will too.”

Lizzie froze, rereading the message again and again.

Her eyes darted around, but there was no one suspicious in sight.

Other than the message, the rest of the sheet was blank, with no indication of who sent the message or what they wanted. 

This had to be some sort of dumb prank, right?

Yeah, that must be it. Lizzie pocketed the note. It was just some dumb prank, not a funny one at that. 

Yet she still couldn’t shake it off as she headed toward Math. She just needed to confirm with Madison. Unfortunately, when she arrived, her friend was not in her usual seat.

Normally, this wouldn't be a problem, as she could just sit down and wait, but Ms. Tomson was the only teacher who used assigned seating, and of course with her luck she was in a pod with three smelly boys.

Madison stumbled into class only a few seconds after the final bell, taking her seat in a pod with Morgan and the others.

Unlike earlier, Madison seemed a lot more carefree. Their table flowed with conversation, and giggles were passed back and forth. Morgan looked up, their eyes meeting. Lizzie turned and looked out the window, as if she hadn't just been caught staring. 

As class begun, Lizzie secretly unfolded the note, reading it again. Lizzie frowned, she would just have to confront Madison after class.

As they began working on their worksheets, Lizzie suddenly received a notification on her phone. It was a message request on Instagram. 

"Hello Lizzie"

"who is this"

"Oh no one special just people who knows your secret."

Lizzie looked up, eyes darting around, but everyone seemed busy with their worksheets.

"ur lying… if this is just some dumb prank stop it"

"We are not."

"how could you possibly know my secret"

"Duh. Madison told us."

The message almost made Lizzie drop her phone.

"what did she tell u??"

"Cmon, you already know what. And unless you want everyone else to know, we suggest you dont tell anyone else about this. There will be more to come, we will be in touch."

Lizzie stared at the last message on her phone. Suddenly Madison's cold demeanor made sense.

She had leaked her secret. 

Lizzie leapt up from her seat, picking up her bag and leaving the room, running to the nearest bathroom and locking herself in a stall. 

But why? Wasn’t she her friend?

But it was the only explanation that made sense. How else could the perpetrators know Madison was the only one who knew?

And why would Madison want to be friends with someone like me?

It was a question that had popped up in her mind soon after the choir trip. It was one she’d pushed away time and time again. But now those doubts she’d buried deep into the recesses of her mind all came bursting back. Why Madison had been so friendly to her all this time. Why she’d encouraged her to start the chess club. Why she’d even approached someone like her during the choir trip.

What if it’d all been a ruse? An attempt to get close to her just to learn of her secrets.

Madison was a great actor, she’d seen it first-hand: one moment she’d act all cheerful and friendly with teachers and classmates only to turn around the next and whine to her about how annoying they were.

No, that’s ridiculous! A voice yelled from somewhere.

There was no way her friend would con her on for that long. 

She bit her lip. But what if learning about her secret had changed everything? Knowing that she was friends with a bedwetter, and one that couldn’t even keep her diaper on at night.

She was exactly the type of person popular kids picked on, not the type that they befriended.

What if it wasn't intentional? Madison had told Lizzie all sorts of drama about the other kids in their class, who's to say she didn’t accidentally spill her secret as well?

But bedwetting wasn’t just some other gossip about ‘who liked who’! Clenching her fists, she imagined the girls giggling about her newly-exposed secret. 

There was a loud bang, and a sharp pain shot through her hand. It took a moment for Lizzie to even realize she’d punched the wall of her little stall.

Biting the tears back, she buried her head in her hands. How could Madison do this to her? Accident or not, it was unforgivable. She had betrayed her, there was no doubt about that.

An eternity later, she emerged from the bathroom. Head hung low, she shuffled to the nurse’s office.

Her fabricated story was solid. Soon, her mom arrived to pick her up early.

She dodged Jennifer's inquiries on the ride back, only stating she had a massive headache while doing her best to look pale. 

For one reason or another, her mom didn’t question it, and let Lizzie lock herself in her room when they got home.

Wallowing in sorrow, she tossed and turned on her bed. The usual assortment of funny shows and scrolling did nothing to lighten her mood.

Moments after she’d tossed her phone aside, it chimed.

“hey girl i heard u went home early u aight?”

Lizzie's mouth fell open as she read the message. A heat began rising in her chest. Not only had she leaked it, she had the audacity to act like nothing had happened. 

“oh ya as if u dont alr fking know u…”

She barely managed to catch herself, canceling the message and tossing her phone aside. How had she been stupid enough to have ever seen her as a friend?

***

Despite her begging, Jennifer forced her back to school the next day after confirming her temperature was normal.

Lizzie trudged up the pathway. The hood of her black hoodie pulled over her head. Secrets like hers spread like wildfire. There was no doubt, her life was ruined. 

Her eyes, bloodshot from a sleepless night, darted back and forth as she entered the building. She expected people to look her way, pointing, whispering, and giggling. But instead, no one seemed to pay her much heed as she shuffled her way to her locker.

As she was still contemplating why that would be, she received a message.

“Dont worry, your little secret is safe with us for now. But if you dont want us to accidentally let it loose, then come to school tomorrow in pigtails and overalls. Oh and wear something pink. And dont even think about hiding it under a hoodie. Wear it loud and proud. Youll get further instructions then.”

Blackmail? The audacity! The mere thought nearly made her smash her phone on the ground.

Taking a deep breath, she collected herself. At the very least, the message confirmed her secret hadn't been fully exposed just yet.

She considered going to Principal Matthews. But without any evidence, her blackmailers would just walk free and reveal her secret to everyone. What she needed was some cold, hard evidence, then she could report it, and hopefully get them expelled.

Examining the sheet of paper didn’t reveal much. The perpetrators had printed it, leaving no handwriting or obvious marks.

She turned her focus back to their conversation. The intent of the messages was clear. Her tormenters wanted to embarrass her with a ridiculous and childish outfit. It seemed mundane enough, but Lizzie was worried what would come next.

In order to gather enough evidence, she needed to comply for as long as possible. Whoever was pranking her would be watching her, and Lizzie planned to use that to her advantage.

She spent the remainder of the day alone, collecting her thoughts. 

Madison had spammed messages at her all day, acting all concerned and worried. But Lizzie wasn’t about to fall for that again, and simply muted her.

By the end of the day, Lizzie had a full list of her classmates who knew her. She went through, thinking about who might have beef with her, but she didn't remember crossing anyone.

The question remained — who could it be? And why were they out to get her?

The next morning, Lizzie adorned the outfit her blackmailers had demanded. She pulled on a pink top, frowning at herself in the mirror as she put it on. 

The overalls were next. The only ones she had were a size too small, likely back from when she was ten, and she had to lengthen the straps as much as possible to even secure the buckles in front.

She tied her hair into pigtails, groaning in the process. On a different day, perhaps she would’ve found the little girl in the mirror cute. But today, her only saving grace was the flaming passion radiating from her eyes. She would find out the people behind this and make them pay.

“Well, don’t you look cute today, what’s the special occasion?” Jennifer asked as Lizzie sat down for breakfast.

She only scowled, picking at her plate of scrambled eggs.

Her mom looked at her for a few seconds. “Alright, I’m sorry for asking. I’ll go wrap up some work in the study, call me when you’re ready to leave.”

*** 

Well, this was worse than expected. Lizzie shuffled quickly down the hall, painfully aware of every stare.

The turned heads, the muted giggles, each glance sending another wave of heat to emanate from her cheeks. She clutched onto her jacket in a pathetic attempt to hide her overalls.

Her first class revealed yet another level of embarrassment. As she sat down, the already undersized overalls tightened even further, giving her a very unwelcome wedgie. She found herself unable to sit still, yet each movement only worsened her situation.

She undid one of the straps, almost sighing from the relief. Carefully, she undid the other as well. Checking herself, she nodded, her outfit actually turning out somewhat stylish.

Unfortunately, her respite was cut brief, as her phone vibrated with a new message.

"No one said you could undo the straps. They better be on for the remainder of the day."

Begrudgingly, she refastened them. Even at their loosest setting, they still caused the entire outfit to press into her uncomfortably.

But it wasn’t all for nothing. The message had inadvertently revealed that at least one of her perpetrators was in her morning class, narrowing her search to twenty-two people.

The classes up until lunch were mostly uneventful, and Lizzie mostly kept to herself while secretly eyeing her classmates.

She ruled a few out, but the majority were still suspects. She could feel their eyes on her as she walked down the halls, darting away only as she turned to look.

It was only halfway through History class that she received another message.

“Good job keeping your outfit intact.”

Lizzie looked around, but everyone seemed focused on the lecture. 

“who r u and what do u want”

“1 more request and youre off the hook. go record yourself singing old macdonald had a farm.”

“what???”

“Its really not that difficult. Go find some place and record yourself. Send the video to us and youre off the hook”

“y r u doing this”

“You have 15 minutes. Unless you want us to leak your secret!”

“but im in class!”

“Thats not our problem.”

Lizzie felt her heart begin to race. What was she going to do? Sweat was already beginning to form as she looked around the room, trying desperately to find out who was secretly messaging her.

But her search proved futile. She didn’t have enough clues yet. All her thoughts arrived at the same conclusion: she had to continue with her blackmailers demands.

“10 minutes… And you have to sing it all in one go.”

Thankfully, Ms. Morrison wrapped up her lecture, handing out worksheets for the class to work on.

Lizzie quickly got up, requesting permission to go to the restroom.

However, when she arrived there, she found two of the other stalls occupied. There was no way she could record herself with people listening.

Her mind raced, where in the school could she film without anyone in earshot? She scratched her head, until one place came to mind.

She sped-walked down to the basement, and peeked her head into the choir room. As expected, it was empty. To further seclude herself, she headed to one of the practice rooms, shutting the door behind her.

Alright, just film this stupid song and get it over with.

Her resolve was clear. She just had to continue acting compliant and eventually her perpetrators would make a mistake, and that’s when she’d strike.

But, as she propped her phone up and turned on selfie mode, she was faced with her reflection. The pink shirt, the tight overalls. Not to mention the way her pigtails bounced as she paced about the room. It was all too much.

No, they’ve already seen you. Besides it’s just a song. It's not that bad.

Lizzie held her clenched fists up as she groaned loudly.

“Old MacDonald had a farm—“

She paused the recording, staring into the ceiling as she felt the blood rushing to her cheeks. 

It’s just a song, there’s nothing embarrassing about it!

Other than the fact that it’s a children's nursery rhyme. 

“5 minutes…” The text interrupted her thoughts, and Lizzie forced herself to continue.

“Old MacDonald had a farm, E-I-E-I-O…” Lizzie half-whispered, half-sang, eyes adverting the camera. However, her voice stuttered during the next line, forcing her to restart. 

She shifted uncomfortably, tugging at her all-too-tight overalls, heat rising from underneath her pink top.

“2 minutes…”

Lizzie squeezed her eyes shut, taking a huge breath. 

“You can do this,” she said aloud.

“You can do this!” she repeated, louder this time, trying to manifest confidence she didn't have.

Finally, on the fourth attempt, she managed to get through. Without waiting, she sent the video.

“there happy??” 

Had she made it in time? It had only been one verse, but it was their fault for not specifying, right?

A typing indicator appeared. The seconds dragged on like hours as she waited.

“The presentation could use some work but you pass.”

Lizzie let out a small sigh of relief, before quickly shaking her head. No, she shouldn’t be happy. Her blackmailers had gotten exactly what they wanted, now she needed info.

“so ur done now… u wont tell anyone??”

“For now, but dont give me any reason to.”

Lizzie smirked. At least her secret was safe for now. And her blackmailer had, without realizing it, given her a valuable clue. 

…dont give me any reason to…

Her blackmailer was operating alone. On top of that, they had made a point to seem like they were operating in a group before, which meant they were trying to appear scarier. But working alone also meant that they'd be harder to find, and she needed to get more clues.

With her ordeal temporarily behind her, she returned to class, and her day quickly drew to a close.

She’d tried messaging her blackmailer, but it had simply been left on read. There were no notes or messages the following day, but she remained on high alert. 

She’d reread all of their correspondences several times, yet nothing new stood out. That left carefully studying each of her classmates. 

She snuck around, casually walking by groups to eavesdrop on their conversations. It would've been easier if she had a friend, but without Madison, she couldn't trust anyone.

By the time lunch rolled around, she'd learned nothing. Lizzie grabbed her food and headed off, about to go eat by the stairwells where she could be alone.

Out of the corner of her eye, she spotted her old group, chatting and giggling. Lizzie just hoped she wasn’t the topic of their conversation.

"You aren't eating with your normal group today?” 

Lizzie looked up to see two girls she didn’t recognize.

“Lizzie right? Come sit with us,” the other girl said.

She found herself quickly led over to a table with several others, who were already deep in conversation about the upcoming party. 

She eventually realized that they were all Vanessa's friends, a group that Madison often hung out with. But today, she noticed her ex-friend stayed primarily with the choir group.

Her loss. Lizzie smiled, after her joke had gotten laughs around the table. Surprisingly, they were all cool and casual, not to mention friendly. By the end of lunch, she’d already exchanged Instagrams with a couple of them, and she left toward her next class with a slight spring in her step.

Even if she couldn't find out who her blackmailer was, it wouldn't matter if she just made new friends. And with the party coming up, it was the perfect opportunity to do so. Perhaps if she became friends with all of the popular people, no one would even believe it if her secret got leaked.

She didn't need Madison, or any of her old choir friends. She just needed to make new friends and move on, and then perhaps she could cast her past aside and start anew. 

---

Author's Note

Hello all, 

Firstly if you're here, thank you for reading Lizzie.

I know you all have waited far too long for this, and I want to say to each and every one of you that have continued checking back over the past year eagerly but patiently waiting for updates: thank you… I truly don't deserve it.

With that out of the way, I wanted to provide a bit of a backstory for what happened in the last year and a bit, and why it's taken me this long to post. I also want to provide some high level for what to expect for the story and why. And finally, I want to provide an update of what's to come. 

This is a bit long, so please feel free to skip any of the sections and read what you wish (there are titles for each section). This is definitely a rant, but I hope it may be entertaining to some. Without further ado, let's get to it.

Section I - What took so long?

There are quite a few reasons. 

Firstly, life has been quite hectic over the last year. Aside from just spending more time with friends and family, I also had three major events - I changed jobs, I moved, and I started seeing someone! It has been hectic, but it has also been great. Unfortunately, all of this meant a lot less time to dedicate to writing. That being said, my partner has been super supportive of me writing, and is why I have still been able to progress.

Secondly, I was honestly worried how this chapter would be perceived. I hit some writing block right after finishing Chapter 17, which was a bit of a mini climax / resolution. Coming down from that ending, I spent some time thinking of where I wanted the story to go. During my reflection, I realized several problems in my original plan, and I spent a few months therein just re-outlining the final arc in more detail, redesigning segments so that they would align with my goals for the story.

All of this in hopes of finishing Lizzie in accordance to my own vision.

But as you've already seen — the result is that Chapter 18 doesn't contain much AB-related content. It serves as a setup for the final arc. So when I did eventually finish writing chapter 18, I began being plagued with self-doubt. I had already made everyone wait several months, and to release a chapter that might be taken as a "filler" chapter felt bad. I know, I've stated my goal several times: Lizzie is not an ABDL-first story. It never has been and never will. But I still had to take into account the forum(s) I'm posting to.

I know my readers have been fantastic, and even for similar chapters in the past, you have been more than patient and understanding, and kept following to see the story evolve. But regardless, the thoughts did plague my mind and I will admit at times it felt difficult to continue.

I contemplated several different ways to write the story, perhaps even scrapping my original outline. But in the end, I decided to write Lizzie my way, I decided that anything else would be disingenuous. But more on this later…

Thirdly and finally, is my decision on how to finish the final arc. Let me start by saying that three years ago, I never could've imagined to see myself here, nearly twenty chapters in, easily a full novel (in terms of word count) already written. I never could've imagined I'd have so many passionate and kind readers that helped the story get to where it is today. 

I want to do Lizzie justice. I want to write a story that means something to my audience, and importantly to myself as well.

I've said this before — I am still well in my early days as a writer. I still mess up a lot of the basics, let alone the intricacies of trying to develop and create impactful characters, their relationships, and an engaging storyline. 

So I knew from the get-go that I would never be able to execute Lizzie perfectly. But I still wanted to finish it to the best of my ability.

Perhaps that's why, early into my writing of Chapter 18, I decided that the entire arc needed to be consistent. While previously I was only writing and posting one chapter at a time, it has led to areas where I wish I could go back and edit but couldn't.

Thus I decided I needed to finish the entire final arc, before posting the next chapter.

And that brings us to today.

It took a little longer than expected, but as of today, I have actually completed the first draft of the entire final arc.

And right now, I believe I made the right choice. As I wrote out chapters, I found myself making several changes (both large and small) to previous ones. Overall, I hope this translates to a more coherent story. But I'll let you be the judge :) 

So that is why it took so long. I went through several iterations of many of the chapters and faced a series of writer's blocks, but in the end, I believe I have concluded the story how I wanted to, to the best of my current ability.

I don't think it's perfect, far from so, but it's what I want to post now. I don't want to be stuck in a cycle of self-doubt and never finish the story. You all deserve better than that.

Section II - Where is Lizzie headed?

This will be spoiler-free, but does mention some intent. If you prefer to stay completely in the dark, then feel free to skip this section.

I already knew the direction I wanted to take Lizzie from the on-set of the story, even though I didn't know how exactly it would evolve and flesh out. I definitely modified my original outline a ton (I wonder if any of you would be interested in seeing some of the changes along the way). 

As I've mentioned several times - Lizzie has always been a story first, with AB-related content as the "cherry on top". The final arc focuses on tying together the relationships of Lizzie and her closest friends and family, as well as around the problems central to the story. While there are still a decent amount of AB-scenes (and hopefully enough to be interesting for those that look forward to them), my personal goal was how I could tie those in naturally to the overarching plots of the story.

So Chapter 18 may have gone in an unexpected direction. Although, if you've been reading Lizzie from the beginning, perhaps this isn't completely unexpected. Lizzie isn't meant to be "just another ABDL story". 

As I alluded to earlier however, this decision wasn't made easily. I was hesitant, to the point of nearly giving up on the story entirely. I wasn't sure if I was alienating my audience with the direction that I wanted to take the story, and perhaps I am. But in the end, I decided that Lizzie is my story, and I wanted to fulfill my own vision and not someone else's.

If you felt Chapter 18 was jarring, I'm sure you're not alone. My wish as an author is that you decide to stick through until the end, and decide then if the conclusion is satisfying or if you believe I made the wrong choice.

I am eager, perhaps more than ever, to hear all of your thoughts in the comments. Especially in the coming chapters.

Section III - What's to come

As I mentioned above, the remainder of the story is "done". Barring something very major, I will not be making any large changes, and I feel comfortable with that. Perhaps I am completely off my rocker and will end up derailing this story — that will be up to you all to tell me in the comments — but it will be a learning experience regardless.

Moving forward, I will be posting approximately one chapter a week until the conclusion of the story. Lizzie has 26 chapters in total, including one bonus chapter and the epilogue, meaning there are eight more chapters to come. 

The reason I am giving myself a week between each chapter is so I have time to edit. I have done the major edits, but there are several prose and grammar-related problems to fix, as well as minor tweaks here and there. I will give myself some leeway to post a bit earlier or later depending on how much time I have, but rest-assured you will not have to wait too long between each chapter moving forward!

I hope that this at least partially makes up for the waiting I've made you all undergo over the previous year, and I hope it comes as a perhaps welcome surprise.

I will share more as we near the final chapter(s), but I also would love to have discussions with everyone once the story is finished, and give you all a chance to ask me questions, as well as give me feedback to the story as a whole.

I am not sure if this is interesting for folks, but I can share original outlines, deleted scenes / chapters, first drafts, or even my writing process. I also can answer questions regarding any of the scenes, decisions, etc. Not sure if people would be interested in an AMA (ask me anything) type of post after the story is concluded, if so, please let me know!

Section IV - Closing Thoughts 

I have been blessed with the nicest readers from the get-go. From the encouraging words, to the helpful critiques and criticism — from the high engagement in the story, to an amazing level of investment in the story. You have all been amazing.

Thank you all once again for waiting, and while I don't know if the wait was worth it, I hope you enjoy the rest of this journey with me.

Even though I won't be changing the overall direction of the story, I would still love to hear comments speculating about what's to come. I love to see the back and forth debates between differing perspectives, the brainstorming and idea sharing, and just overall discussion. I want to hear about what you loved, what you hated, what you wish could've been done differently, or even just that you're still reading. 

It has always been an honor to read all of your thoughts and speculations in the comments. Seeing the micro-community around the story has truly one of the biggest joys I've gotten posting online. 

I would not be here if it weren't for all of your support, so from the bottom of my heart: thank you all. 

I hope you enjoy the remainder of Lizzie's journey. It really has been a long one, and we still have a ways until the end. As always, I'll be looking forward to your thoughts on this chapter and ones to come.

Riven

PS - Mini Retcon

There is a minor retcon made to Chapter 17 — specifically in the conversation on the car at the start of the chapter, and when Philip is slated to return. Feel free to go back to read it, but otherwise it's not a major shift / change — only a change to better align with how I wanted to take the remaining chapters.